This week's mindful mantra is unconventional in nature but an important attempt to flip the switch on our negative thought process trying to send it in a more positive direction.
How often do you find yourself frantically looking all over the house for that one thing you need? Saying over and over in your head something along the lines of "where is it?" , "I thought it was right here!" or "I need to go, why can't I find it?".
While moments like these are stressful, they don't need to send your day off in the wrong direction. Stressful moments like these do not need to be the catalyst of our day.
When everything seems to be "going against you", is not the time to revel in the bad and stew in your own misery. There is an opportunity here. A moment to make a healthy choice. You can either replay the things that you didn't like, further engraining them into your mind OR you can choose to highlight the good things (no matter how few or far between they might be).
Perspective is what you make of it.
If you take the time to think of things in a brighter and happier way, that is how you will remember them. If you choose to attach gloom and doom to your everyday moments, then generally speaking, you will probably feel both gloomy and doomy (that' a word for now).
It is true, there are times when everything seems to go wrong all at once. Hence the saying "when it rains, it pours". It is also ok for you to take moments to grieve, feel sad, forgive and accept. Everything feeling deserves it's time and place. What is important is the effort, not the doing.
If you put in an effort to look for the good, replay the good in your mind and appreciate the moments by highlight what is going right (using our mantra What is Going Right?), then you will live a happier and more positive life overall. Conditioning ourselves to lean on the side of negative or positive thoughts comes down to the moment to moment things we choose to think about, and of course, how we choose to think about them.
An example of this: Once I overheard someone else replaying my pregnancy as a really hard time. The back story to this is that during my pregnancy I found out I had a stuck kidney stone. After a couple failed procedures, a nephrostomy tube being put in (to drain my right kidney), it being ripped out twice and was infected a few times, people looked at me with sadness and pity. I appreciate that while being pregnant people were feeling sorry for the fact that my body simultaneously gave me kidney trouble, but this was not a product of the pregnancy.
Did that time suck? For sure it did.
Do I think that my pregnancy was overall a hard time because of my kidney stone? Not at all.
My pregnancy, other than the kidney stone (which actually had nothing to do with my developing daughter), was a breeze. I got sick once or twice, I felt great most of the time and I was active and happy.
While one person thought those last few weeks ruined the entire 9 months, I couldn't have disagreed more. I loved being pregnant. While I was gratefully remembering my time being pregnant, others were retelling my story as hard pairing it with a sad look or tone.
What happens to us it generally out of our control (we can debate that at another time). What matters is our choice in our perspective, our effort in highlighting the good and our ability to look back with a sunny bright lens as opposed to a grey and gloomy one.
Try it with me this week, and make a choice to ask yourself often What is going right?! So that you too can condition your mind to hang on to the positive things going good in your life.
Show love, grow love
Happy Living Parents!